I am in first-year engineering and tomorrow our semester exams are going to end. Our whole semester ended and I am not feeling happy, exams are going to end and I am not feeling excited. It’s been two years and I am still giving online examinations the same copying cheating it doesn’t feel like studying when you know you can pass very easily.
I know I may sound like a studious nerdy kid like you may be thinking what is my problem I am getting full marks we can pass our examinations easily what is the problem then. I don’t know the marks don’t give me excitement as they used to give, I am not even able to recall the score of my last week's test even though I can recollect my 9th or 10th-grade score. It is like that because I worked hard at that time and not now. I know exams score don’t matter much but still the fact that I know I will pass my exams without putting in any effort has made me a lot lazy.
Many people got time to try new things because of online examinations and I am happy about it but somewhere I feel sad I didn’t work hard. I don’t like when someone asks me my 12th-grade score and I can’t answer them because I got a score way beyond my reach. I know almost everyone knows we copy in our exams because otherwise, it's impossible to get full marks in engineering examinations. I feel bad when my parents ask about my score and even after hearing a high score don’t doubt that I may have cheated. I may have sounded like a silly person but I don’t want such marks which will make me feel ashamed or guilty.
I know offline exams were tough sometimes they used to make me tense or sometimes made me question myself but the best part was going through it. I still miss the summer vacations we used to have after our term-end exams in school. We weren’t happy because we are going to have a long vacation, of course, that was exciting but what more exciting was that our exams are finally over after 2 weeks of hard work, anxiety and a lot of stress. I would never say run behind marks because getting 100 after studying like hell and getting 80 after studying well every day wouldn’t make much difference and it won’t matter much but still if you are wasting time doing nothing knowing you can get full marks then it’s always better to study a bit and get average marks because it will only increase your knowledge.
I know it's very difficult to do the right thing when there are so many temptations around, it is a phase and it will end. Our college will be opening soon and I am excited about it, I will be meeting new people making new friends and going to have new experiences (I am also scared about exams because finally, I will have to study for real).
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