Have you got into a small talk with someone and then felt embarrassed about talking something weird and then felt embarrassed about it. A sheer current of anxiety passing from your body when you approach a person to ask something. That's what social anxiety is all about. It is a chronic mental health condition in which social interactions cause irrational anxiety. For people with social anxiety disorder, everyday social interactions cause irrational anxiety, fear, self-consciousness, and embarrassment. People having social anxiety are really scared about what others will think about themselves. More often introverts face this kind of stuff because of minimum communication. They lack some basics about mixing up into a conversation with people. But it's fine nobody should change their initial behaviour just to create an awesome image in front of people. So in this blog post, we are going to discuss about social anxiety. The thing which people normally face.
The spotlight effect
The spotlight effect is the phenomenon in which people tend to believe they are being noticed more than they really are. So if you are walking on the road and you feel like the people around you are making fun of you or they are passing some comments on you or you might think that they are judging the way you are dressed. This is what the spotlight effect is you constantly think that people are noticing you every minute you enter a crowd or a college class where the students notice you when you enter. But it is actually not true, people are more often concerned about their problems and their life. Even if they judge you they aren't going to take you seriously for more than a minute. So forget about "what will people think". Instead, you just focus on the thing you are doing at the very moment so that you won't go wrong and make the next mistake to grab someone's attention 😅.
Things that go wrong when you face social anxiety Social anxiety can ruin your overall social life. When having to perform in front of or be around others, people with social anxiety disorder tend to blush, sweat, tremble, feel a rapid heart rate, or feel their “mind going blank” Feel nauseous or sick to their stomach. Show a rigid body posture, make little eye contact, or speak with an overly soft voice. Extreme cases of untreated social anxiety disorder can lead to isolation, depression, other anxiety disorders, or even agoraphobia. Agoraphobia is an anxiety disorder that often develops after one or more panic attacks. Have you heard about the song called "Lose Yourself" by Eminem where he starts the song with the lines like "His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy...." and then it comes down to "he's nervous and keep songs forgetting" at the same moment I felt like this actually what social anxiety looks like. I genuinely have faced these kinds of situations when someone approaches me for help and I get nervous just to interact with them whether I would give them the wrong advice or something. You start sweating during a conversation and also your voice starts trembling even if you have the idea that you know it.
Ask for an advice
This is a weird thing. You need to approach a person or even some people whom you care for or the ones you understand properly and ask them how to create a better conversation. In short, you have to ask for help. I did the exact same thing where I asked my friends about how I can create a proper connection with a new person or even how to respond to strangers when someone approaches you at the supermarket or a bank for small talk or something. So here's what my friends told me. 1] Be the first to approach. 2] Don't think about anything intensely while approaching someone to talk because when you think about anything too much you barely make the move. Make the decision quickly. 3] If someone is not responding even after your move to make a conversation get off from there. Here's one more thing which I have heard a lot. When you want to make a deep conversation with anyone or if you want to bond well with someone try to show interest in their conversation. I mean show personal interest in what they are speaking. When you show some interest in what they are conveying they will also listen to you. It works in a cycle.
There are other things which I am trying to add into my behaviour is trying to give the whole attention to the person with whom you are with and also looking into their eyes when you are speaking to them. That shows that you are interested in the conversation and whatever you are speaking is legit. So that things I am not including here coz I haven't tried it yet but I will let you know how it goes 😅.
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